Sticky Fingers

As parents, you never know what to expect. From the time when she was 3 and I caught her walking the dog on the roof wearing only what god had given her to the bathing of herself and all of her toys in vaseline she could always surprise me. She is articutate, smart and easy to be around. When it comes to self assurance, it exists in her. She never ceases to amaze me for what she was, what she is and what I know she can be. We have been known to exchange jokes (not just telling them to one another, but practical jokes ON each other). Playful bantor, regarding boys, school or anything that comes to mind. As an honor roll student she can manage quite an edge. This brings us to the call. The phone rang and I answered it. Jessica was on the other end. "Dad, you need to come to Kohl's, I have been arrested" I was sure this was one of those times. "No, you haven't, I'm busy don't play with me". I knew how stupid an idea this was. My daughter, the chosen one, driving around in her 2 seater sports car. Wearing her Abercrombie clothes and living the good life. How could she possibly be under arrest? "Do you want to speak to the officer?" now it was seeming a little more real. "Yes, put her on". It was then that I realized, this might be true.

I had seen Jessica a little earlier at Target. I did not recognize the brood that she was running with. Two nice girls, not in Jessica's regular crowd. Nice enough though. The fact that I let them borrow my car to go to Kohls should have expressed my comfort level. Like any good father, as I made my way to Kohl's, I convinced myself that the two evil girls had formulated an evil plot to corrupt my little princess into a life of crime. Somehow, they had forced her (no doubt with a threat to injur her hero father)to SHOPLIFT. Nevermind that my daughter was a free thinker and had never been "led" to anything. It didn't matter that she was a born leader. At that moment, someone corrupted my princess and there was going to be hell to pay.

When I entered the store, I was greeted by a security guard. Still convinced that my poor 16 year old had been bamboozled, I was not as sociable as I might normally have been. How can I put it so you understand. Ok, I got it. I came into the store as if I were liberating a freed hostage, held against her will in the most dire of conditions. Talk about the air being let out of my balloon....

The girls were sitting, hapless against the wall in the tiny loss prevention office. I had the pleasure of being the first parent on the scene. The two evil girls with my princess were crying. Jessica was sitting up, redfaced, flushed and obviously under some sort of strain. The piles of clothes were seperated into distinct piles. One for each of the perpitrators. As I reviewed the inventory, I could tell that there evidently was a shortage of undergarments in all the houses. If you can imagine, as the father of 3 teenage daughters, the thought of foraging through their panty and bra collection is frightful. As they become young ladies, against all the laws of life, these items become smaller and more (or less as the case may be)intimate. So now, envision 3 security personell and a local police officer holding up, one at a time, your teenage daughter's, the princesses choices of undergarments to steal. Including but not limited to, the leopard print bra, the panties with graphic writing on the bottom and the mathching set of candy apple, red lace, one size too small, should only be on an adult woman underwear, for everyone to peruse. Needless to say, I was embarrassed. Humiliated, and even though I was not showing it to her, convinced that she had been led astray by the evil doers she had taken up company with. Then the moment of revelation. The officer in charge told me that at some point, they were going to have to escort my daughter to the dressing room. It seems that of all the girls, she was the one with clothes still on her person. She put some of them on under her current clothes, and was still wearing them now. You can say what you want, but at that moment I knew. I knew that the evil girls might have dropped some items in the princesses bag. They could have knocked her down and forced her to shoplift some items. It was not conceivable to me, however, knowing the princess, that they could have taken her to the dressing room and forced her to wear stolen merchandise. My daughter was a theif. She made the decision on her own. She was not led into it. This was a thought process she had gone through and it was evident she was not coerced.

The rest of the day was not eventful. I was almost glad that it happened. Its not good to think your teenager is perfect. Thats where the problem comes in. If you don't allow them to be flawed then there is never a chance for education. Oh, don't get me wrong, there was hell to pay. If her mother had not been there to stop the wrath we might have seen the police again. But thankfully, she understood that this was one of THOSE events. One of those milestones of life. One where choices become consequences. Hopefully a learning experience.

I enjoyed spending the first month of summer with my oldest daughter. Her busy schedule had prohibited that. The opportunity for her to work in the yard, clean the house, my car, her moms car, her aunts car, the windows and all the bathrooms seems to have really caused us to bond. Not having to spend time talking through her cell phone, and having her in our car for short trips to the store or anywhere seems to have brought us closer together. The fact that none of her freinds were there to interfere with our exchanges was refreshing. Thats the lesson. More time with my princess, a little tarnished, but yes still my princess.